Study Sessions
I’m 12 years old and staring at a Spanish test. The words are twisting together so that all I can see are blurs on the paper. I think I may actually be crying. I don’t even understand what I’m supposed to be doing, all I know is that I need to pass this test so I won’t get a bad grade in Spanish. I failed the last two tests though, and I don’t think I can pass this one either. I can’t do it. And I can only cry at how stupid I am. ****** The test in front of me has strange words swimming across it. They make no sense. I know that it is English, and I know that I recognize a few of the letters, but the rest is a mystery. What sound is that supposed to make, and what sound is my teacher making? She’s standing at the front of the classroom, reading from a paper with all the words we are suppose to know. But I don’t know, I don’t know any of them. My paper blurs, and my eyes sting. I know I’m too old to cry. I know that I can’t let anyone else see. But it’s not fair. I’m good at everything else. I pass all my other classes, so why can’t I pass this? Maybe I’m just stupid. ****** I’ve been in Korea for two weeks now, and I’ve been studying Korean for equally as long. I’ve mastered the alphabet, though in truth I had studied that before I even set foot on this continent. Back home I had the help and encouragement of half a dozen Korean students from the adult English classes I taught. They praised me for memorizing the alphabet so quickly, and they were excited to teach me words and phrases. It felt good, exciting. I couldn’t wait to get to Korea and show how much better I was with this language than I had ever been with Spanish, or Latin, or French. But two weeks in and all I could do was grit my teeth and complain as loudly as the students beside me that this was unfair. Why would the teacher cover their mouths when speaking the vowels and consonants? When would we ever be talking to someone without seeing their mouths? And when would I ever need to know exactly what vowel sound they had just made? How unfair was this test? And why, when I had been so confident the weeks before, could I not get it now? What was wrong with me? ****** There is a new English teacher today. She smiles at us and says hello. She shows us pictures of her home and her friends, and she talks about something. She seems nice, but I have don’t have a clue what she’s saying. Everyone around me is nodding in agreement, sometimes they even ask something, in Korean, or in English. But I don’t. I don’t ask anything, not to her. I couldn’t understand her anyways. A new picture is on the screen and there are people in it doing taekwondo. One of the students asks, in Korean, who they are. The new teacher doesn’t understand but our teacher, the Korean teacher, says something. The new teacher laughs and says something too I think. I don’t understand. I want to though; I want to know how she knows these people. I turn to my friend and ask him. When he doesn’t answer I ask again, and then a third time. Finally, I hit him. Why won’t he listen to me? The new teacher comes over and scowls at me. She says something I don’t understand. I do understand she is angry. She crosses her arms. And I cross mine. I hate English. ****** In a brightly lit and very cold room a woman hands me a certificate of completion. I have finished the intermediate Korean course offered at city hall. I smile, and shake her hand, laughing towards the man with the camera. My teacher pats me on the shoulder and says something in Korean. I don’t know what. But I smile and laugh and pretend to understand. After the ceremony, and after the dinner, I take a long bus ride out to my little village. Once off the main street the path becomes windy, and dark, and I have to wedge myself into the corner of the seat to keep from falling over. Outside the window the few lights from the small houses that line the road blur past, until suddenly we are once again washed in the yellow street lights of a main street. I get off the bus and wrap my scarf tighter around myself, shoving one hand into my pocket while the other one clutches the certificate. My fingers ache in the cold, even with the gloves. I want to drop the stupid thing just so I can get my hands warm. I want to leave it in the frozen mud where it will get buried under leaves and dirt, and by the time the spring comes again it’ll be unrecognizable. I don’t deserve it. I didn’t learn a thing in that class except that I am as bad at languages as I remember being in seventh grade. Instead, I take it home. I pack it in a box in the laundry room, along with all my Korean books, and both sets of notebooks almost completely filled. There’s no point in pretending anymore. I’m never going to understand this. ****** It’s the start of the new semester, and I’m on top. My new teacher likes me a lot, and my coach is proud of me because I helped to win the last match. She tells my teammates it’s because I never do anything halfway. When I get into the ring I go at it with all I’ve got, even if it means I might make a mistake. I put as much force as I’ve got into
A Day in the Life of a Heungdeok High School Student
by Tiffany Chu The biggest highlight of my Autumn Camp was seeing our school film come together in less than one week. I asked for student volunteers to step up and take the lead on this project, and I was lucky enough to get five passionate & dedicated campers + one non-camper, who was the man behind the seamless camerawork. My vision for this project was to have campers consider the most important elements of Heungdeok student life and condense these ideas into one video that they could share with their homestay families this winter break and ultimately, anyone who is curious to see what Korean students are involved in outside of their traditional academic classes. I’ll never forget the mornings in my English classroom spent reviewing filming schedule and our afternoons spent running all around school making sure we didn’t miss anything. I met our school’s award-winning shooting team for the first time (one of the members is currently participating in the 2015 Asian Games) and galloped on invisible horses across the soccer field with my film team. I was mistaken for a student countless times by other teachers and at one point actually donned a student blazer for a scene that didn’t make it into the final video. I’ll never forget the look of horror on a 3rd grade student’s face when he walked by in the middle of us filming a student leader stopping me in the hallway tensely and with a small push to inform me that my hair was out of dress code. :’D Through each of my 24 campers, I was reminded once again of why I came to Korea in the first place — to discover the many facets of Korean students that are often overshadowed by their portrayal in books and news articles as one-dimensional study machines. I fell in love with my students over the course of two short weeks, as they invited me into their lives and revealed their incredible talents and creativity. These are students who have a passion to explore the world. Yet, they are each uniquely fearless enough not to lose sight of who they are in doing so. Though my students all wear the same uniforms and may look similar on the outside, they are people with diversely beautiful dreams and the self-determination to get them there. I am so proud of the work we accomplished during autumn camp!
I Think About
Student images and poems collected by Breanna Durham, ETA at Yongwon Middle School, Gyeonsangnam-do Province Jin Su-Jin Jin Su-Jin– (I Think About Poem) Yongwon Middle School I think about love because I like handsome men I think about traveling because I want to go to France I think about spring because spring is beautiful I think about baseball Because I like baseball players About Sujin and her work: Sujin’s pieces show her determination to decide things on her own and produce her dreams by her hand. It also showcases her confidence. She’s a student that likes to joke and shock you with her writing. She pushes to express herself without holding back, even if it gets difficult to do. This is not something that all students do, but she makes those around her be bold too. Lee Yana Lee Yana – (I Think About Poem) Yongwon Middle School I think about eating fruits because I like to eat delicious food I think about having a good shape because sports are very hard. So, I think people who have a good shape are training hard. About Yana and her work: Yana is a second grader in Yongwon Middle School. She grew up in Russia. She was born there and lived there for 9 years. She still remembers doing Tae-Kwon Do in Russia. She thinks of it as being harder there than in Korea because she had to do intense training. She’s not doing Tae Kwon Do now, but said that she wants to do it again. That’s why she wants to train and get in shape. She likes to treat herself with eating the fruit that she loves. She also likes to think about puppies because they are cute. She had one, but had to give it away last year. This sometimes makes her sad. However, she remains a positive person that seeks to achieve new heights. In her imagination, she likes to think about flying like the magical girls she saw as a child. She wants to be amazing like them too. Moon Ye Jin Moon Ye-Jin – (I Think About Poem) Yongwon Middle School I think about eating because I want to eat egg tarts I think about playing phone games because when I play phone games, I am excited I think about listening to music because I feel good I think about a handsome boy Because my eyes feel good About Yejin and her work: Yejin’s piece is a look at the simple pleasures and the emotions they bring. Yejin has said that she usually feels bored with her daily life, but doing things like playing games or eating her favorite foods breaks that pattern and offers moments of fun and happiness. Yejin typically has a relaxed and playful personality. She’s a social student who brings her bright attitude into our English class and in every project we do. Even if a project isn’t in her usual interests, she becomes passionate about it for that moment and makes it feel as if it has always been her passion. Han Hyo Min Han Hyo Min – (I Think About Poem) Yongwon Middle School I think about the universe I think about freedom I think about going home I think about the next exam About Hyo Min and his work: Hyomin is a soft spoken student who works diligently in class. His gentleness and thoughtfulness often carries over to how carefully he makes his projects. In these pieces, Hyomin compares something he loves to his daily life. He likes to study things concerning the universe. To him, it’s mysterious and exciting. Though he doesn’t have a telescope, he likes to search the internet for pictures of the stars. Even when he thinks about freedom, he compares it to the sky. He said freedom is like the color blue. To him, the color means feeling comfortable. Freedom is feeling comfortable. He said that he often doesn’t feel free with the exams he has to take and the studying he has to do. His poem and artwork bounce around the idea of freedom ultimately existing in the universe, yet feeling absent from daily life.